So, it is my birthday. I never wanted to make any big deal out of it, I momentarily forgot about it. All I wanted to do whenever it came to my mind was lay on the bed all-day playing a new game, not doing anything serious or maybe just sleeping. Taking a break is the best word that fits.
However, this morning after I was had woke but still on my bed, my mind started running through the several phases of my life, don’t know why it had to be on my birthday anyway. I went down memory lane, the struggles, the failures and the small wins; the rejections and the acceptance – They all make sense now, a bit of all of them has made me who I am today.
Again, my mind navigated through that phase of my life where people had come and gone, where people had come and stayed, where people had seen nothing in me and where people had found a treasure to cherish in me – They all make sense now, a bit of all of them made me who I am today.
I thought I had it all figured out. I took steps that turned out to be full of mistakes; I took steps that turned out to be full of wins! I took steps that questioned my intentions; I took steps that gave me the heart of a lion, I got an understanding that brought me on my knees. I saw myself being a product of both extreme, the Lion and the Sheep – They all make sense now, a bit of them made me who I am today.
In the journey of life, the ones I have gone so far, I met people and people met me. Some became friends, some became colleagues, some became “we used to be friends”, some became critics, some became fans, some took the label of enemies and some decided to take their place on the fence. All of you have played tremendous roles in my life – They all make sense now, a bit of them made me who I am today.
I have hurt certain people unintentionally, people also meted out the same on me. I think it is part of being human after all. To some, I didn’t keep to my words, to some I gave the gift of disappointment, to some I wasn’t what they saw from afar. But, to others, I am the gift they prayed for and I am the gift they admire. I failed to meet up to certain people’s expectations and I went beyond some people’s expectations – They all make sense now, a bit of them made me who I am today.
Some people have rejected who I am; some people have come to see all of me and yet accepted me the way I am. Some left me on a journey we decided to take together and others joined me on the way. Had it been I didn’t take that journey at first, they would still leave and I wouldn’t meet those who continued with me – They all make sense now, a bit of them made me who I am today.
I have learnt to accept who I am, to accept who I am not and to live the best of me in my world. I have learnt never to close the door of my heart because someone meant to pass through it despite it is meant to be a residential area, I have learnt to give life a chance and another chance. I have learnt from my failures and appreciate my small wins. This is because – they all make sense now, a bit of them made me who I am today.
I am learning to be better every day, I am learning never to repeat certain mistakes and even certain victories, and I am learning to be progressive in my winnings and not static. Everyone who has been in my life, who are still in my life and who will be in my life means a lot to me, one way or another, we have a piece of each other’s heart stuck together. What a lonely existence it would have been without all of you – They all make sense now, a bit of you made me who I am today.
I may not have mastered the art of perfectly loving God, but He knows how to love me, he designed me, framed me, wired me and set me on course. He knows how to fix things and make them work for good. He used you on me the way he wanted. Right from when I didn’t notice, he blessed me with uncommon gifts, made me stand out and ultimately, he called me “my own”. If nothing matters, this is all that matters. – It makes sense now, God made me who I am today.
Happy Birthday, to me.