SAY “NO”

Onyedikachukwu George Nnadozie

“No” is very powerful, whether I’d regard it a word or also a tool isn’t clear but being very powerful is what I am sure of. Okay, let’s be even, “no” is as powerful as “yes”. The level with which “yes” can agree is the level with which “no” can disagree. Imagine employing the same force you should have used in avoiding a problem to cause yourself problems! It will be fatal!

Unfortunately, many of us are too used to agreeing than disagreeing because we don’t want anyone to get hurt, we don’t want anyone to feel bad and we want to be accepted by people including those that we don’t even need their acceptance for anything. Therefore, we can establish on this ground that “no” is only for the strong people, people who can stand rejections and mockery, people who can stand not being celebrated or pleased with.

What do you do when you see yourself in situations you aren’t pleased with but you are scared of showing your disapproval because you don’t want to be the one odd out? What do you do when someone is leading you in the wrong path but you just can’t say no because you don’t want to hurt their feelings? What about your mother pressuring you to marry someone you don’t even feel any connection with but you don’t want to be a bad girl by saying no? What about those times you were being forced into a career path that isn’t your choice but because you felt the burden of saying “no”, you gave in? I could go on and on…

In the end, we get to please people but we stay hurt! Of what use is spending all you have on the poor and dying of hunger? You need to stay alive and healthy, to work harder and take care of more people. That is how it is when you try pleasing people against yourself. It may hurt your best friend but if saying no is the best option, stick to it.

Do you think that by taking a different stand, those who used to love you will start hating you? If they do, they never loved you in the first place. Saying “no” will save you a lot of stress, it will save you from self-inflicted depression and you’ll be free from hurting yourself. Those who can’t respect your “no” don’t deserve you!

Remember, people can only tell you what they want you to do but you get to decide what to do. Sometimes it’s only you who truly know what is right for you, sometimes people aren’t in your heart to really understand why you have to say “no” but you still owe no one an explanation! Say no if you have to say so and be bold about it.

Some people are dead today because they said yes, some ended up in dirty marriages because they said yes against their own heart. If certain things are shady about anything, you don’t have to assume it will be alright, you don’t have to let emotions play you out. If you don’t understand that business deal, say no! It doesn’t matter who it is coming from, whether it is coming from your spouse, friends or relatives… If you aren’t comfortable with agreeing, disagree peacefully.

You must not go on that date that your heart isn’t peaceful about, you must not give out your phone number when your heart insists you shouldn’t, you must not visit him or her if it is not okay by you! It is not a terrible thing to say no,  it is very important to listen to your heart sometimes.

Say no to that proposal even if your parents approve of it but your heart doesn’t. Say no to that business even when multitudes are running into it but your heart isn’t settled about it. Say no even after you have said yes but realized you were quick to give an answer. Don’t let anyone rush you into anything… They may say you promised and failed them but it is better than promising yourself your own destruction.

You know your purpose more than anyone does. If anyone should get the blueprints of your life, it is you that can do that! If anyone should inquire of God about your purpose, it is you that will do that! You know your strength and your weaknesses better than anyone else. So, when it is not in line with your purpose… SAY NO!

Blessings

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