So, this isn’t just to fulfil all righteousness, this is another insightful exposition into what makes women get attractive or stay attracted to the man or maybe their man! Sometimes it becomes very confusing to a woman what exactly the man she is dating wants from her especially when he isn’t very vocal about it.
Sometimes a feeling says “he is just trying to flirt around” because it is believed men are adventurous and therefore would always want to try out their ability to pin down a woman. A time may come when you probably start thinking he is experimenting that with you! On the other hand, you may think “he is just being friendly but not entirely serious.”
Yea, sometimes people just want you for a time, they want you as someone who would be there till they find what they are looking for but then you may also think “well, this one is serious!” Truth is, looking closely at their fruits, you can find clues to what they want and whatever you decide to do with them is up to you!
Let’s talk about what makes a woman extremely attractive to a man that she would want a journey beyond mere friendship.
Have you wondered why certain men come across beautiful women, make friends with them for some time and eventually slip off to a “less attractive” woman and eventually end up marrying them?
Well, if they were less attractive, how come they attracted that man more than those considered extremely beautiful? The truth is, attraction is very beyond the looks and mere appearances. Yea, looks is one of the most important aspects of initial attraction but it is not enough to make you stay attractive.
Especially when a man is gearing towards long-term relationships, he looks much deeper than just your good shape and outfits! The problem is that some women who consider themselves very attractive have just their good body shape and more accepted facial looks as their selling point while those who don’t have that face magic decides to develop inwards! The inwards will always be superior to the outward!
The primary purpose of marriage is companionship and so any man or woman wanting to take things seriously will not just make decisions based on mere appearance! Those who did will educate you better on how things can appear nice but terrible inside. So, whether you are mingling with someone who isn’t mingling with you or you want to know how to make yourself more attractive from the inside out, I’ve got few points that will inspire you!
STAY FEMININE AND LOVELY OUTWARDLY
Yea, we have said it is beyond looks and outward appearance right? But listen to me, it starts from there but doesn’t stop there. This doesn’t mean you’ll have to be in the best makeup and dress round the clock because you’ll still have him wake up with you and see your worst facial appearance but at the start, you’ve got to hook him with something and make him stay with something else.
Your look matters a lot but you just have to look like you and not Beyonce or Rihanna! Everyone sees things differently and what attracts you may not attract another person. God designed every one of us to have diverse preference, this is why one may want a black car and another wants a red car! Black isn’t the only beautiful colour like we hear everyday “black is beautiful.”
It all depends on the path ones taste is going! The problem many women make is trying to adopt another kind of attractiveness that may not even be suitable for them. Maybe after watching a TV show, you want to look like the presenter or actress! You have to pursue looking the best of yourself and not wearing the mask of another person’s identity!
You need to understand that you must not be attractive to every single person out there! Being sexually provocative or trendy doesn’t mean being attractive. Don’t mind people who don’t find the real you attractive, clean them off your mind!
Don’t try becoming that magazine woman. There may be things you hate about yourself but hey, why should you hate something about yourself? Maybe you aren’t like that slim girl down the street, maybe your nose isn’t pointed and you have large eyes!
Who told you those are what defines beauty? Focus on becoming the very best version of yourself! So, wear those clothes that make you feel great about yourself! Put on the best attitudes which on its own is more important than dressing! Don’t overlook your shape, stay fit in the shape that God designed you into. Yea, just stay feminine and lovely!
FOCUS ON PEOPLE YOU SHARE SAME PASSION WITH
It is useless trying to be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t share the same passion as you! Don’t force a passion for something you don’t like on yourself just because you want a man in your life. Yea, there may be other attractive features about someone but if their passion isn’t in no way your passion, the relationship may also experience shipwreck in the long run!
What do I mean by sharing passion? It doesn’t mean both of you will be doing the same thing, it doesn’t even mean both of you will love the same thing, it means that you are both compatible towards loving certain subjects, both of you can stay long, talking about something you are both interested in without being bored!
Another side of it is that if you are a Christian who loves the principles of Christ, you wouldn’t be wanting a man who spends nights in the twerk-night club! You wouldn’t want a man who is always in the street drinking and smoking, you may want at least someone more ethical! You should want someone who shares the same value as you.
You need to be open to finding his passion else they’ll always be withdrawn to you. Have you noticed some families don’t watch movies together, they don’t read together and they don’t even go out together? They are just there, everyone minding his or her business. This is because they aren’t sharing the same passion.
There is also when to reach a compromise, yes, there is where you can adopt passions as long as it isn’t harmful and it can even help you! You may have to like football just because of him just as he may have to like soap operas and Telemundo because of you! Sharing passions with your man makes him feel a very deeper connection with you and every man can’t let go of that person who is so deep into them! It is a kind of intimacy, it shows you can or you are willing to walk together with him!
BE A HELPMEET
A helpmeet is a goal-mate! The idea behind the manifestation of the woman to the man was based on being a helpmeet! Many times, men are usually suppressive of their emotions making them need someone they can always trust and talk to about their visions.
This makes every man desire someone who would share their goals with them! This means you will be willing to move in the same direction as your man unless you don’t truly want him! You need to connect with someone who wants the same thing you want! It is like a man who doesn’t want kids getting married to a woman who wants seven kids!
Every man needs his woman as a backup, they want a woman whose goals can align with theirs in a way that they can support each other. Any man who is ready for the next level of relationship with you will always have this at the back of his mind.
If a man’s goal is to always roam around the world, does yours match with him? If his goal is family-oriented, does it match yours? You can’t help your man move forward when both of you don’t share the same goals. You save yourself from huge issues when you ensure your goals lines up with that of your man!
HAVE YOUR OWN GOALS
Especially at this age, you must have your own goals and dreams! Nothing makes you more attractive than pursuing your dreams and making the best out of your life. Men don’t just choose women, women also have a choice, they can make their choices of who to spend their entire lives with!
As a result, you must have some level of independence in which your own goal speaks volume of who you are and what you want! You don’t just help your man fulfil his goal, you have a life too and you aren’t leaving behind all you represent just to follow a man!
You just have to align your own goal with his own or he has to align his own goals with yours! The most important thing is making sure both of you are walking the same path!
The Bible described the virtuous woman in Proverbs 35 as one who has her own life too! One who is running her own business while being the help fit for her man! Many people think a woman shouldn’t have her own life goals, they think the woman shouldn’t be ambitious especially when single.
When we say that a woman’s goals should align with her man’s goals or vice versa, we say so because there is no hope in a relationship where goals are conflicting! It will mean that both of you are working against each other.
You shouldn’t marry a politician if you don’t want to have anything to do with politics, you shouldn’t marry a Pastor if you don’t want to have anything to do with Pastoral ministry. This is why you must ask deep questions and understand the direction your man is going in life.
BE ATTENTIVE TO HIM
No one likes a partner who isn’t attentive because it sends a lot of wrong messages across. When you aren’t listening to your man, it makes him feel you have no serious value for him because you can only pay attention to what you value.
Every man loves a woman they can share anything with and it creates a deeper connection with that person. If you aren’t attentive to your man, you will be very less attractive to him and he will always find confidence in others to share what he isn’t free to share with you.
The man may not open up to you immediately until he realizes you pay apt attention to him. Paying attention to him includes understanding when his mood swings, when he isn’t in his best looks and all of that! This shows that you are concerned about him and he doesn’t take it for granted! There is always a promising future for a relationship where both partners are true to themselves.
Sometimes people feel compatibility just happens but no, things are designed to be compatible, it doesn’t happen unintentionally. An IOS app will never work on the Android app because it isn’t designed to be compatible with android. It can’t even happen by mistake.
In the same way, you must intentionally build compatibility if you want to stay attractive. Compatibility means creating an environment where your partner finds it easy to be with you, no man will want to be with a woman with whom it is difficult to strike a conversation or do anything meaningful.
Don’t make your man always fight for the relationship, don’t make him always work so hard for it because, with those in place, it is a sign of incompatibility.
Yea, there are people you just can’t be compatible with because their life is just different from yours but there are people you can develop compatibility for and they can also develop it on their end. If you have to worry every day and feel insecure every day about your man, it means you aren’t compatible with him and vice versa! Attraction is not compatibility. While you can be attracted to someone, it doesn’t mean compatibility has been achieved!
I will tell you the truth, religion or not! Every man wants a woman that can be free around them, a woman that can be free to hold their hand and talk into their ears! One sign that you aren’t compatible with him is when you aren’t finding it easy to stay around him or when he isn’t finding it easy to stay around you!
When you are always forcing yourself to be funny or excited around him, you guys haven’t achieved compatibility. Try building it and if it isn’t working, don’t stress it further! Every man finds a woman who is compatible with him very alluring and will never want to let go.
Always be in a good mood around him, always be happy and joyous. This doesn’t mean that when you aren’t happy, you shouldn’t show it. But don’t let resentment and anger have its way! If anything goes wrong, settle it immediately and move on!
The alluring woman is a happy woman! You may want to read “The Alluring Man“.
I call you blessed.